Ask Britta - Wedding Wisdom

The average wedding in America costs between $20,000 - $30,000, which is some serious dough. While you certainly can have a great wedding for a fraction of that cost, unless you totally elope or only invite five guests, your wedding is probably going to eat a chunk of your savings (or max out your credit card.) When you think of everything that goes into your wedding—venue, caterer, music, cake, dress, etc., even the thriftiest couple finds that the costs all add up. Here are some tips to help keep your wedding budget—and your credit card bill—under control.

1)   Cut your guest list. The best way to save money is to reduce the number of people at your wedding. If you were having a sit-down dinner at $50 a head, cutting 20 guests saves you $1,000. If you haven’t seen someone in years, or have never seen them, you probably don’t have to invite them to your wedding. And just because your third cousin twice removed invited you to her wedding, it doesn’t mean you have to reciprocate. You’ll need to put your foot down with your respective families to make sure they don’t get carried away. Do this by giving your parents a number set in stone, and tell them they can ask that many people. This way, they can decide which of your great aunts really needs to make the list. If you have thirteen siblings and twenty cousins and fifty nieces and nephews and you talk to every one of them each day, have a super intimate wedding and reception the day of, and then throw a big reception for everyone later. Send out wedding announcements after the fact with an invite for a big BBQ or dessert bar.    

2) Pick and Choose. What part of the wedding do you care about most? Are you a serious foodie? Did you meet working for a radio station? Pick your most important aspects to splurge on, whether it’s a five-course meal or a top DJ, and cut back on the rest. If you two are wine connoisseurs, chances are your guests will be too busy appreciating your fine wine to notice that your cake wasn’t made by the top bakery in town, or conversely, when they’re digging into their triple chocolate ganache torte, your guests won’t be complaining about your lack of canapés. Buffet meals are a cheaper option than sit down dinners, however the long lines can be a total drag. If you do have one, try breaking it up with different food stations around the room to cut down on lines.

3) Don’t hold your reception at a meal time. If you have a seven o’clock reception, you’ll look kind of cheap if you don’t serve dinner—and you’ll have to put up with hungry, cranky guests. Move it up to four and serve the same menu however, and your guests will be impressed by your spread of tasty hors d’oeuvres. If you’re super cash strapped, you can serve cake and punch after the service, just make sure it’s not during a meal time. Also, note on your reception card what sort of reception it’ll be, that way guests can prepare. Generally, if you’re just serving hors d’oeuvres, you can say “cocktail reception to follow” or “light refreshments and dancing” etc. If you are just serving cake and punch, hold it immediately after the service at the same venue. That also cuts down on reception rental fees, as most places will give you a set packaged fee, and some places, like church basements, are free. (Lots of churches won’t let you serve alcohol, which is a plus if you’re a super cheapskate, as alcohol costs more than fruit punch.)

4) Don’t hold it on a Saturday. Most venues offer significant discounts if you hold your wedding on a weekday—some even throw in free catering. Also, since they’re probably not trying to pack in five other weddings on the same day, they might be more relaxed about reception length and provide you with more focused service. While it might never have occurred to you, a Thursday evening wedding could be lots of fun. And because the next day is a workday, your guests will probably hold back on the drunken revelry, cutting down alcohol costs and overtime fees. Picking an “off-day” is also a good idea if you don’t have a lot of time to plan your wedding, as popular spots get booked up years in advance for Saturday dates. Friday evening and Sunday weddings are also less expensive than Saturday afternoons. Also, avoid three-day weekends. They’re super tempting if you have out of town guests, but if you’re thinking that way, so are all the other couples out there, so they end up being some of the most coveted days on the calendar.  

5) DIY. Paying extra for little conveniences like return address labels all adds up. With a little spit and elbow grease, you can save money by doing it yourself. Don’t worry if you’re not Martha Stewart—even if you’re all thumbs, you can probably manage to tie your own bows on your wedding favors. If you are super crafty, and have nothing better to do with your time, this is your chance to show off your skills, from making your own centerpieces or bridesmaids dresses. Also, if you have a friend who’s a baker, or a florist, you can ask them to contribute their skills in lieu of a wedding present. Just remember, doing flowers for a wedding or baking a wedding cake is a huge commitment, so don’t be hurt if they have to decline. Conversely, watch out for friends who volunteer to do a critical task without having the skills necessary. Just because your friend makes a mean Birthday cake doesn’t mean she’s up to the task of tackling a wedding cake—even serious bakers have wedding cake fiascos, and you don’t want to end up as a cautionary tale. (We have a story involving a homemade wedding cake, a car trunk, toothpicks, and warm weather. Trust us. You don’t want to hear any more.) Likewise with wedding invitations or wedding dress offers. Be cautious, and make sure your friend has a realistic idea of the time and skills necessary for the project involved. That goes for you too. You might save some moolah doing DIY save the dates, but is it worth the 20 hours and four reprints you had to do? If a task is doable but tedious, take it on, but if it’s genuinely out of your skill range—or someone else can do it in 3 hours to your 30, go ahead and outsource.